Updated: Feb 10
Raise your hand if you’ve witnessed other women who seemingly glide through life effortlessly asking for what they want, and easily rejecting what they don’t want. You may be wondering what their secret is. How are they so confident? How do they say “no” to things they don’t want to do, instead of “yes” and then kicking themselves after, how in the heck do they set boundaries and hold them?
Setting boundaries that stick is an art.
I like to call it Boundary Badassery.
When you are able to master the tough conversations, put yourself first, share your needs clearly, and stop being a doormat, you can’t help but feel like a Badass!
One of the most valuable benefits of learning to set boundaries is that instead of constantly feeling like you’re a victim of others’ actions or in-actions, you begin to see how YOU are the only person responsible and capable of meeting your own needs.
You begin to take responsibility for upholding your own boundaries, instead of expecting anyone else to. And that feels AMAZING! Before you can hope that others will honor your needs, it’s important to look and see, how can you respect your needs in a more relevant way?
Really take a look at all the sneaky little ways you dismiss your own needs. Do any of these sound like you?
* You often feel like the victim of other’s behaviors. * You prefer not to say anything when someone hurts you or cheats you (intentionally or accidentally). * You feel it’s virtuous to put others ahead of yourself and you feel mean or selfish when you try to assert your desires. * You often feel resentful toward others because they don’t’ seem to take your needs into consideration. * Your partner calls you several times throughout the day to talk about problems at home and things you need to “handle”. * Your mother comes over unannounced and then proceeds to tell you everything you’re doing wrong with your life. * Your kids leave dirty clothes on the floor knowing you’ll always pick them up. * Your neighbor plays loud music every night, but you say nothing. * Your boss repeatedly asks you to work extra – on weekends and evenings – without notice or additional pay. * Whenever you go out to eat with your friend, she tells you what to eat and you simply follow her suggestions. * Your partner repeatedly makes plans without asking for your input. * Your friends invite you to dinner and you always let them choose the restaurant. * Your family is always setting you up with people, even though you’re in a relationship. * Your waiter delivers the wrong entree, but you don’t want to return the food. * You’re freezing at your friend’s house on a visit, but you don’t want to ask to have the heat turned up. * Your teenager takes money from your wallet, without asking or telling you. * Your partner puts you down in front of friends and then acts as if you’re too sensitive when you ask them to stop. Hi I’m Marla Martenson, and I’m a Boundary Coach. In 12 weeks, I can lead you to transforming from a wimpy doormat, into a happy, confident, sparkly Boundary Badass.
I invite you to spend 45 minutes with me as I lead your through a mini coaching session, and share with you what your life could be like on the other side of Boundary Coaching.
I invite you to spend 45 minutes with me as I lead your through a mini coaching session, and share with you what your life could be like on the other side of Boundary Coaching. Book your FREE discovery session HERE.