If You Get Ghosted While Dating, Here’s the Best Approach as a Single Woman
- Marla Martenson
- 4 days ago
- 2 min read
By, Marla Martenson
Let’s normalize something real for a moment.
If you’re dating as a single woman right now, chances are you’ve been ghosted at least once.
A conversation that felt warm. Consistent texts. Maybe even plans.
And then… nothing.
No explanation. No closure. Just silence.
Here’s the part most advice gets wrong: Ghosting is not something you “fix. ”It’s something you respond to.
First: Don’t Personalize What You Can’t Verify
Ghosting feels personal because it activates rejection.
But in reality, it usually says far more about the other person’s emotional capacity than your worth, desirability, or communication skills.
People ghost because:
They avoid discomfort
They don’t know how to communicate honestly
They keep options open instead of choosing intentionally
None of those are reflections of your value.
And none of them are problems you can solve by trying harder.
Second: Resist the Urge to Chase Clarity
One of the hardest moments is the pause right after you notice the silence.
Your mind wants resolution. Your nervous system wants certainty. Your heart wants reassurance.
So you consider:
Sending a “just checking in” text
Explaining yourself
Offering understanding in advance
Here’s the reframe: Clarity that requires you to chase isn’t clarity — it’s self-abandonment.
Emotionally available adults communicate. They don’t disappear and expect you to decode meaning from absence.
Third: Let the Silence Be the Information
Ghosting is an answer.
It tells you:
How someone handles discomfort
How they treat people when interest wavers
How safe they are to build something with
You don’t need a paragraph to confirm that. The behavior already did.
And here’s the empowering part: You get to decide what behavior you allow access to you.
Fourth: Respond With Self-Respect, Not Strategy
The most grounded response to ghosting isn’t a perfectly worded message or a clever power move.
It’s this: You stop investing where there’s no reciprocity.
You don’t harden. You don’t shame yourself. You don’t rush to replace them to prove something.
You simply redirect your energy back to your own life — where consistency already exists.
Finally: Choose Meaning Over Momentum
Not every connection is meant to continue. But every experience can reinforce your standards.
Ghosting doesn’t mean you failed at dating. It means you filtered out someone who couldn’t meet you where you are.
And that’s not a loss.That’s alignment doing its job.
The goal isn’t to be chosen by everyone. It’s to recognize who can actually show up.
And then choose accordingly.
If you’re a single woman navigating dating with self-awareness and depth, you’re not asking for too much.
You’re asking for clarity, communication, and presence.
And those are basic — not optional.
If this resonated, I created a free guide called No More Crumbs: Your Boundary Blueprint for Being Chosen and Cherished.
It’s for women who are done over-explaining, over-giving, and waiting for consistency to appear.
Inside, you’ll learn how to:
Set boundaries without guilt or games
Stop auditioning for emotional availability
Shift from “almost chosen” to deeply respected
You don’t need better dating tactics.You need standards that actually protect your heart.
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